Why can’t people in a relationship just decide to each walk away when the relationship ends? Why can’t we let the police or the justice system deal with business partners or acquaintances who steal from us or rob us when doing a deal?
Something is very wrong with our society. We can’t resolve every problem we encounter with murder! The days when death was mostly an accident are a thing of the past. Ninjas be dying for even looking at other ninjas with a bad eye.
So #TheRaverend would like to send a quick warning to unsuspecting Kenyans on five ways to get capped! Killed! Or murdered in Kenya.
One: Mess with a sponyo’s mpango wa kando. That’s the fastest way to die in Kenya. Like if you’re a young guy and your chick has the latest iPhone and Samsung and she drives and she has no employment, run very fast! Don’t mess with that girl; she is another man’s property. A man with a gun or who can afford to hire men with guns to get you capped.
Two: Not paying debts. If you like taking loans or are the type of person who lives beyond your means, and you go around borrowing money and have no plan to pay or settle the debt, your ticket to meeting your maker iko jikoni!
Three: Con-trepreneurs. Being a serial conman, if you have perfected the art of conning other Kenyans and making that your profession, you will get a first-class ticket to the other side!
Four: Wheeler Dealer Bonoko! If you’re the type of Kenyan who jumps into deals and because your greedy you keep all the spoils to yourself, you will be found dead like a dog very soon… Kenyans are not joking. If you get into a deal, make sure you only keep your share, not the whole share.
Five: Sleeping with married women is another deadly sin in the 254. This crime is so messy that even the authorities might turn a blind eye once someone bursts a cap on your ass.