Ever wondered whether men and women view booty-call relationships as short-term or long-term affairs?
In a booty-call relationship, a couple meets on repeated occasions specifically for the purpose of having sex. An encounter is initiated when one of them calls or texts the other requesting a meeting. The expression “Netflix and chill?” has become a catchphrase for a booty call request. The booty-call relationship differs from friends with benefits, in that FWBs also socialize with each other and enjoy each other’s company even in non-sexual situations. A booty-call relationship, in contrast, is strictly sexual, with little or no emotional attachment.
Booty-call relationships share features with both short- and long-term mating strategies. Like short-term relationships, the focus is on sex to the exclusion of any social or emotional component. But unlike one-night stands, booty calls involve repeated encounters with the same partner.
Ideally, we all want our sex partner to be attractive, kind, and wealthy, but in the real world we have to make trade-offs.
For short-term mates, both men and women rated physical attractiveness as a necessity, but they saw kindness and social level as luxuries. This finding is consistent with plenty of other research on short-term relationships, which are strictly sexual in nature with no other social or emotional component.
For long-term mates, men still considered physical attractiveness a necessity, but women saw it as a luxury. Both men and women in these relationships view kindness as a necessity and social level as a luxury.
This may reflect changes in society, as many women nowadays are financially independent and don’t need their mate to be the bread-winner for the family.
When it came to booty calls, both men and women rated the attractiveness of the partner as a necessity, suggesting that they viewed these as more like short-term than long-term relationships.
However, women—but not men—view kindness as necessary, implying that women see booty calls as somewhat similar to more committed relationships. This supports the notion that booty calls are, at least for women, a sort of exploratory sexual affair that has the potential of developing into a long-term relationship.
The men, in contrast, seem to consider booty calls as a series of one-night stands with little thought toward the possibility of deeper commitment.
Women on the other hand view booty-call relationships as more committed than their male partners do. March and colleagues conclude that the booty call may be a compromise between short- and long-term mating strategies, but this is mainly a compromise only for the women.
In my opinion, consenting adults should be free to pursue whatever sexual activities they want to. But I also think they need to keep their eyes wide open to what they’re getting themselves into. When it comes to sex, open communication about expectations is essential if couples want to maximize the benefits of the relationship without getting burned in the long run.