Opera Exclusive: Why Kenyan Men Are Masturbating in Public

A Kenyan man masturbating in public (Courtesy)

In the last few days, we have been bombarded with countless videos of men beating their meat aka masturbating in public. 

While some have been sort of demure with it, others have invaded women’s personal spaces like a swarm of desert locusts by ‘doing it’ in matatus, bus stops and even churches. Acts that leave many women feeling degraded, disturbed and wary of being in public.

The question on many people’s minds is why would someone perform such a heinous act in public whilst there are countless private spots you can relieve yourself in?

It is this grand wave of fappenings that got Opera News interested in unravelling this weird phenomenon.

Our first stop was talking to a psychologist in one of Nairobi’s major hospitals who revealed that the reason for this disgusting display can be due to a mental condition called Sexual Exhibitionism.

“There is a condition called exhibitionism that causes you to expose yourself to people you don’t know. People who have the condition experience extreme sexual arousal when exercising unwanted sexual authority on unwilling participants such as displaying their private parts,” the psychologist explained.

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Sexual Exhibitionism (Courtesy)

We did not stop there. Other psychologists agree that it’s a deviant behaviour. An article by Michael Bader D.M.H. on Psychology Today also revealed that men who display this kind of behaviour are often anxious/insecure about their masculinity. A man who displays this kind of behaviour needs to ‘reassure himself that his penis, his manhood, is not bad, defective, or insignificant’.

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“This is turn drives a man to overcompensate with narcissistic displays of ego and with competitive aggression, especially with women, in order to reassure himself that he is powerful and important, masculine, rather than weak and vulnerable, that is, feminine…When a man’s anxiety is high enough, the masturbatory sexual fantasy becomes a compulsion and blots out any genuine empathy he might feel. High levels of anxiety cause such men, desperate for anything that will bring them relief, to become especially self-centred,” explains Michael Bader.

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For other men, masturbation is an act of revenge against women.

“Exhibitionists purposefully look to shock their victims because they are angry. These are acts of revenge against women. These men are imposing the body part that is most threatening to a female and in doing so, they are acting out what is called ‘sexualised hostility’ against their prey. That look of fear or humiliation on women is arousing to them,” Alexandra Katehakis, director of the Center for Healthy Sex in L.A. told The Cut.

Exhibitionists purposefully look to shock their victims because they are angry- Katehakis (Courtesy)

So why is there a rise in this habit? A Nairobi phycologist believes that it has something to do with extreme stress that can stem from difficult situations such as the tough economic situation in the country.

“I don’t know why its on the rise exactly. There has been a rise in many issues including people killing each other and so I’m wondering about our mental health in general. Since it’s a psychiatric condition and many psychiatric conditions are triggered by things like a lot of stress, too much stress can cause the person to have a full-blown episode,” she explained.

Confessions of an Exhibitionist

A man who frequently masturbated in public recently revealed on the Xtian Dela Toboa app that he is addicted to masturbation. This addiction has cost him his family because he can no longer enjoy normal sex.

“I am addicted to masturbation. It’s so bad that I lost my wife and kids because of it. I can’t just enjoy normal sex, I always masturbate after sex. Without it, I don’t feel relaxed. I’ve spent all my money on porn subscriptions online. I’ve watched all types of porn just to fill my urge,” he confessed anonymously.

Confession (Toboa)

However, his ferocious appetite was still insatiable and he started masturbating in public.

“I have masturbated many times in public. Many times in the matatu, in hotels even at the stage boarding a matatu. When it comes, it comes, you can’t help it.  I’ve tried everything but I still find myself going back to it. I saw a post about someone who was masturbating at JCC church, I’ve done it too in church a couple of times. I really need help. I hope I find it here, I am desperate,” he confessed.

Confessions of their victims

While the perpetrators of this act seem like they are helpless to their urges, victims of sexual exhibitionism are left feeling powerless, disgusted and degraded.

A former student at Masinde Muliro University confessed that there was a man who would frequently masturbate at their hostel’s gate while she was in University.

“It was disturbing and made me feel insecure because this is just a random man who can rape you. It made me feel vulnerable and afraid of leaving the hostel alone,” she confessed.

Man spotted pleasuring himself in public. Image: Courtesy

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A lady who works as a cosmetic trader in Juja revealed that she got harassed in a matatu while heading to town. She had sat in a 14-seater when a man in a red t-shirt and khaki pants joined the backseat where 3 people were already sitting.

He kept on leaning towards her and she assumed that it was because he had long legs (he was tall) and the matatu was crammed. That was until the man exited the matatu. In his wake, he left some ejaculate on the woman’s dress an act she admits made her cautious of men in these public service vehicles.

Matatus and hostels are not the only places these indecent acts are performed. A woman confessed in a Facebook group that someone masturbated in front of her at Jevanjee Gardens.

“At Jevanjee kuna day nilienda kupass time as I wait for fare iteremke , a guy came n sat next to me, nikiendelea kujipa shughuli then akajifunika mapaja na koti yake sikujua what he was doing me kupinduka tu hivi alikua ametoa kitu nje… nilitoka mbio aki sikuangalia nyuma tena,” she confessed.

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