The news nowadays is filled with horrific stories of women being cruelly beaten and even killed by their spouses.
Most of the time you hear stories of the man being described as ‘calm’ or ‘nice’ but we all know that all that glitters is not gold as some people know how to hide who they really are very well.
Here are some signs that your lovely relationship can turn violent and dangerous in the future:
1. He Is Too Perfect
Abusers like to create a perfect image to lure you in. If he is too good to be true, he most likely is.
2. He Is Jealous and Possessive
While a little jealousy can be endearing to some, a spouse that doesn’t want you to spend time with friends and colleagues is a red flag.
If your spouse is constantly checking up on you, going through your phone or frequently shows up at your door, this could be signs that he is an abuser.
If he accuses you of cheating whenever you hang out with your male friends or wants to be with you constantly, that’s a red flag.
3. He Is Quick to Commit
While this may be flattering, do not get gassed up as most abusers push for commitment and moving in together very quickly. Be cautious of a man who is ready to be exclusive within days of meeting each other. If you feel that your relationship is moving too quickly it’s time to pump those brakes.
4. He Has an Extremely High Temper
If your usually calm and collected boo turns into a Mr Hyde when he is pissed, flings things or shoves you when he gets angry, he will most likely turn into an abuser. If little things set him off, run my sister.
5. He Makes You Feel Like You Are Just Not Enough
You will never be enough for an abuser. He will make you feel that if you treated him better or ‘behaved’ then he will be a loving man all the time.
6. He Threatens You with Violence
If a man constantly threatens you with a beating or tells you that they will kill you, even jokingly, there is a huge chance that he will act on his words at some point in time.
7. He Insults or Belittles You
Physical violence doesn’t always start as physical abuse it starts as emotional abuse. If your partner belittles you and verbally abuses you, there is a high chance that things will get physical.
8. He Is Forceful During Sex
Most abusers use force when it comes to sex, if you don’t want sex he will force himself upon you or make you feel bad that you do not want to have sex with him.
9. It’s Never Their Fault
An abuser never takes responsibility for their actions. If things go wrong at work or in your relationship, other people are always to blame. Be wary of a man who plays a victim all the time.
10. He Is Cruel to Children and Animals
An abuser is often very cruel to animals and children
11. His Exes Say So
Many people like to demonize exes but if his ex tells you to run as he is violent, do not brush it off as jealousy. Most abusers usually have a violent history and a number of his exes may have complained that he is violent.
12. Your Instincts Tell You So
While an abuser may be able to mask who they are for a while, your instincts can see through the b.s. If your instincts tell you that that man is bad for you, he is, don’t wait for the signs.