There’s a myth that a man’s refractory period operates on some sort of set interval. That like a biological cuckoo clock, a new erection magically appears 20-something minutes after the last one gave way to an orgasm, the men whose refractory periods last 20-something minutes and who are most likely responsible for spreading that myth in the first place.
I have no idea how many such men exist, however. Nor does anyone else who studies sex. The truth is we don’t know much about the male refractory period, but we can assume there are probably far fewer men with shorter refractory periods than with longer ones. Few men test their refractoriness. And if they do, they usually don’t tell their friends. Or their doctor.
Women can be multi-orgasmic. Men usually aren’t. The reason is simple. When guys cum, they release sperm-rich semen, which, biologically speaking at least, is only meant for reproduction. Female orgasms, on the other hand, are unrelated to baby making.
Which means women can have a lot more orgasms and in rapid succession. Men, however, need a refractory period to rest and regenerate their sperm count in order to produce enough to get to that female egg.
It wasn’t always like this. Before boys are able to ejaculate, they can get erection after erection, with the time between erections nearly non-existent. But during puberty, a hormonal change occurs that causes the brain to send inhibitory messages after a man’s orgasm. The brain is essentially telling the penis, “No, not yet.
The length of this pause usually depends on a combination of his age, how aroused he is and the sex acts he’s about to participate in. Age is just one factor when older guys become more sensitive to their own refractoriness, it’s usually because the culture has made them develop a fear of losing their boners.
The hotter the sex, the shorter the refractory period. In highly arousing situations, the refractory period a man experiences might be a lot shorter. For many men, highly arousing equals new stimuli.