Cohabitation: When is the right time to move in together?

The prospect of moving in with your partner can be incredibly exciting as well as a bit daunting. After all, you clearly enjoy spending time together and being around one another, but cohabitation can present a slew of new situations and challenges that can shake the foundation of any strong relationship. So in order to prevent a move-in that results in you moving out and moving on, it’s important to recognize these seven key signs that you’re ready to live together.

You’re Moving in Together for the Right Reasons

 Credit: Klaus Vedfelt. Getty Images

Moving in with your partner is a major relationship step, and it should be a decision that you make on your own, without pressure from your partner, your friends and/or your family. You also shouldn’t feel as though you have to move in with your S.O. because you’ve been a couple for a certain amount of time or because you’d like to save money on rent. When you’re really ready to move in with your partner, it should be because you truly want to do so. 

You Know How to Resolve Arguments

When you move in with your partner, new issues and obstacles are bound to arise when you’re living in such close quarters. For example, you may suddenly become annoyed that your boyfriend doesn’t remember to put away his dishes or that your girlfriend is always on her phone when you’re having dinner. However, if you and your partner already have the tools in place that enable you to resolve conflicts and disputes in a productive and amicable way, you’ll be far better prepared to live together under one roof. 

You’re in Sync About Your Future Together

If you’re truly ready to move in with your partner, you should be on the same page regarding what lies ahead for your relationship. For instance, is moving in together the next step before marriage? It’s imperative that you and your partner openly and honestly discuss the potential trajectory of your relationship in order to avoid a cohabitation disaster. After all, if you move in together in the hopes that doing so will change his or her mind about never wanting to tie the knot, you’re not on the path to a happy ending.

You Are Completely Comfortable Around Each Other

If you’re wondering if you’re ready to live with your partner, it’s important that you’re fully comfortable and authentic when you’re with each other. And while you may be used to seeing your partner after you’ve showered, straightened your hair and/or only when you’re impeccably dressed, living together means that real life sets in, and you have to be able to be comfortable with him or her when you have morning breath, are sweaty from the gym and even after you’ve clogged the toilet.

You Are Totally Honest With One Another

When you’re ready to move in together, it also means that you’re completely forthright and open with each other. If you’re hiding different aspects of your past and/or you’re planning to reveal something once you’re living in the same walk-up, this is a big misstep. Rather, in order to have cohabitation success, you and your partner have to be completely open with one another and have a connection that’s built on mutual trust, honesty and respect.  

You Have Discussed Money

If you and your partner are going to live together, you have to be able to talk about money in a mature manner and ask the tough questions. Are you splitting the rent, the internet and the cost of the TV? Who’s paying for groceries and the gas bill? Do you need to buy a fridge, bookcase or perhaps a new couch? Even if it feels a bit awkward or unnatural, it’s imperative that you have a plan in place regarding finances before you finally decide to share a place together.

You’ve Already Experienced Close Quarters

A great indicator that your cohabitation will work is that you’ve already successfully spent prolonged periods of time together under one roof. Whether this means you’ve vacationed together, spent the night at each other’s place and/or that you’re practically living together already, a great sign that you’re ready to officially move in together is that you’ve experienced these types of close quarters and find yourself wanting more. Remember, moving in together is a big step, but when you’ve already shared these kinds of dry runs, your relationship is likely to thrive when you’re sharing an address.    

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