It is not a secret that women are bad drivers. 90 per cent of them have no idea when it comes to issues to do with motis or traffic rules. They always assume they have the right of way.
They will hoot, scream and shout at the slightest provocation on the road. They are always ready to attack other motorists.
However, when the see cops, they will eat humble pie as they craft out the most ridiculous excuses since mankind!
Here are 10 hilarious excuses female drivers give cops.
1. Morning sickness, officer
Once they are pulled over, most women will claim they are pregnant. They will lie how the hormones make her feel horrible. “Aki officer, I’m sick! So sick! 24 hours a day! It’s horrid! Hata mzee wangu anajua. Ebu shika hii simu you call him…Hii mimba makes me forget hata driving licence…”
Not wanting any more drama, a rather shocked officer will let her go.
2. Ohhh…breastmilk is leaking
Since it is difficult to spot a breastfeeding mother, most cops will buy this lie. Most women will claim how their breasts are aching since they are full with milk and need to rush home to nyoyesha the toi.
Some will fake a call to the house girl as they shout…” Analia? Ghai fafa! I am coming to breastfeed him. Aki mtoe nje kidogo.”
3. Flirty, pretty Betty
Some woman have mastered this art. They will wink at the cop as they lift their skirts up for the cop to enjoy an aerial view of their yellow yellow thighs.
When she steps out of the car, she will twirl her hair, smile at the cop and ask how his day is going…Right there, she will make the cop’s heart melt and voila, she is let off the hook.
4. No bulging. Not boarding
These are the worst. They will not be moved. They will play mind games. They will not open the window and will go mute despite the cop knocking on her car’s window. All that time she will be posting on Kilimani Mums how ‘a cop has messed her day’. Sensing he has lost the battle, the cop will let her go. I mean, who wants to waste time under the scorching Nairobi heat?
5. Crying Baby
From time immemorial, a woman’s tears has always been a weak point for many men.
The sight of a woman in tears could evoke emotions in men and make them do things they will not do ordinarily. It is known that a woman’s tears can move an angry man to compassion. So next time you see a woman crying after she has been stopped by cops, just know anachezwa!