Before you stumble out of bed tomorrow morning and take that first piss of the day, just hold things in for a minute and consider what it is you’re about to flush away. After all, someone who has to pass a drug test might pay good money for that clean sample you’re hoarding in your bladder.
Or maybe some South African students might make a brick out of it. Point is, maybe there’s a market out there for that morning leak, so let’s take a look and see before you quite literally piss it all away.
As of 2019, there’s only one real piss market in existence, so let’s start there. Like anything else, urine is worth whatever somebody is willing to pay,” explains Jordan, owner of Urine the Clear, a company that’s been providing clean urine for 20 years.
When you consider that somebody may go to jail if they’re on parole or lose their job if they’re being tested at work, people would be willing to pay whatever they have to in order to not lose their freedom or lose their kids. Right now, on Jordan’s site, two ounces of urine, a quarter cup would run you Ksh5900.95, while four ounces goes for Ksh10,000.
So, if you’re able to find someone who needs the pee directly, you might make about Ksh10,000 but waiting to be approached by shady dudes outside of shopping malls is hardly a sustainable business model so I wouldn’t pin your hopes on that one. Too bad Kenyans are very tough they better distill their own urine than pay for one.